


Pizza

by orphan_account



Category: The Song of Achilles - Madeline Miller
Genre: M/M, pizza delivery boy!au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-05
Updated: 2015-06-05
Packaged: 2018-04-03 01:57:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4082323
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Patroclus didn't even really like Pizza. He had an entirely different reason for ordering out three times a month...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pizza

Patroclus didn't even really _like_ pizza. The anticipation of greasy melted cheese was not what made his hands shake as he punched in the number he knew by heart.

“Hello! This is Domino’s pizza, Achilles speaking, how can I help you?”

That was.

In his dreams, he had a mouthful of witty things to say in reply to that. Witty, suave things that would-

“Hello?”

“Hey! Sorry, I’ll have-”

There was a clatter of the phone cable from the other end as Achilles shifted, his breathy laugh sent static scattering down the line.

“Hey Patroclus,” He could almost see the smile in the corners of his green eyes. “The usual is it?”

He knew it was sad that the pizza place knew him by name but their delivery boy was quite literally a greek god. A greek god that also used his full name, every time, without mangling it. “Weird name club” he’d winked.

“Thanks Achilles.” He honestly couldn’t have told you what his usual was, just that Achilles delivered it. He was ashamed to say that if _Achilles_ delivered him a old rubber boot, he’d probably eat it.

“I’ll see you in twenty.”

Patroclus didn’t know what possessed him in that split second, he definitely hadn’t been in control of his mind when he tagged a “love you” on the end of his “Bye.”

Seconds later, Briseis was picking up. He spat out the sleeve he’d been chewing on and cupped both hands around his brick phone.

“Bri, help me. I need you to come home right now.”  
“What’s going on?” She said in that way that reminded him of a goddess saying ‘ _Who do you need struck down_?’

“You know that pizza guy...?” He asked tentatively

“The blonde one? I thought you needed help...”

“I do! I was hanging up and I accidentally said ‘I love you’.”

There was nothing from her end but urban white noise: exhausts, car horns, shoes on the pavement. She clearly didn’t understand the brevity of the situation.

“He’s delivering my pizza _any minute_ , Briseis.” The sleeve was back in his mouth, stomach churning as his eyes darted over the back of the couch to the deadbolted door. If she wasn’t going to save him he’d just have to go upstairs and hide under his duvet until Achilles shoved the pizza through his postbox. That’s it, he’d leave the money on the doormat and then he wouldn’t have to talk to him.

“What do you need me for then? Surely this is the opportune moment to tell him of that thing you’ve had for him since last halloween.” She was laughing at him now, he knew the tone. He heard a chime through the speaker and the knot in his chest loosened a little. She was on the bus. Thank god, he was saved.

“This isn’t funny. I can never order a pizza there again...”His cheeks burned against the cheap plastic buttons. He was going to staple his lips shut.

“Briseissssssss”

“Yes, yes, I’m almost home. How lucky are you to have me to save you from drooling over the change?”

“The luckiest man alive.” He droned. He wondered how he’d be paying for this one.He couldn’t argue with her though, not over this. Normally he wasn’t a drooler but there was something about how the light caught His curls, the spark in His eyes when He smiled.

“You’re thinking about him again.” Her brogues were clopping along the pavement.

“I’m cursed.” He whined, and flung his phone over by the window. He could do that. He had a Nokia.

* * *

By the grace of the gods, Briseis arrived before Achilles. This also meant that she was present to witness the lengths of how hopelessly smitten he was. He felt her judging him as he fiddled with the blinds so they _looked_ closed but you could still see out. He waited.

“Do you do this every time?” He turned at her snark to see that she was taking a video of him.

He didn’t answer that. He had _some_ dignity.

Between the cracks of the blinds he caught sight of Achilles on his bike, hopping the curb to park neatly outside their door. He’d found it bizarre that a pizza boy could actually remain employed with only a bicycle but Achilles had never _once_ been late.

When the object of his affections passed the window, having set his bike carefully against the wall, Patroclus almost forgot how terribly embarrassed he was. He could see the small curls stuck with sweat to Achilles’ neck from cycling and the pulse where it made his muscles jump. How could he not allow himself this? A man who looked good in a flour-covered fleece?

He ducked when the doorbell rang, curling up behind the wall. He was never eating pizza again. The pounding of his heart in his ears blocked all but the jovial tone of their conversation. As soon as it had begun, it was over. The door clicked gently shut.

That was that. He was never going to see Achilles again. Except, maybe, for one last glance.

He parted the blinds and nearly lost his life when he found a pair of vivid green eyes looking back at him. He pulled them shut on instinct and tried to block out the muffled laughter from behind the glass. Not only had he said ‘I love you’ to the guy, a stranger, now he’d been caught creeping on him.

He’d been all set to flee when a soft knocking echoed through the glass. He could barely believe it. Inch by inch the blinds disappeared and Achilles was _still_ there, his cheeks almost puckered with the force of his smile.

Patroclus’ own cheeks were scarlet around his grimace, he could see them reflected back at him in the glass. He didn’t know why Achilles was still there, or why he was still there _and_ smiling, but he knew that he didn't want him to stop. The neighbour’s hedge swaying behind him made his eyes glow all the more.

“Im-look I’m really...” Pat tried, bracing one hand against the glass, unsure if Achilles could even hear him. He wasn’t really sorry, either.

A small tap made him realise he’d looked down, unable to stand the face of rejection and scorn. Something black reared up in his head and waited as he raised his eyes again.

A napkin was flat against the window, curly black digits pressed hastily into it. Patroclus’ brows furrowed, was this a joke? Achilles smile had faded but there was sincerity in the raised brow and the tilt of his head. A golden hand raised up beside his ear in the universal sign of ‘call me?’

Unable to tear his eyes from what _must_ be an apparition he felt around on the floor for his phone. In series of glances he took down the number and then was left dumbfounded as the smile returned full force, blinding him. A wave, the chime of a bicycle bell and Achilles was gone.

A flash of light startled Patroclus and there, beside him, stood Briseis. He’d almost forgotten she was there. No, he’d completely forgotten she was there.

“You were drooling” she said tearing off a chunk of Pizza with her teeth.

He couldn’t even argue with her.

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first thing I've ever actually posted on here, so feedback would be lovely.  
> Basically an out of control au headcanon I ended up writing for someone on tumblr, so do with it what you will ^^


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